Happy Living
Popular Podcasts
Total Podcast Downloads
Through Sept 30, 2015
Member Area
  Member Login  
Are You
Really Listening?
Written Sunday 05/22/05 by Joseph Rossini

Last week we discussed how writing can help you to learn and share. The same could be said about listening. Thereís a great deal to learn from listening intently to others. By doing so, you will also become better at sharing your knowledge and create mutual win-win solutions . Too often we relate how well we communicate through the spoken word by the breadth of our vocabulary or how eloquently we can deliver an explanation, presentation or speech. However, I believe that listening can contribute up to 70% of our verbal communication effectiveness.

I learned early on in my sales career to carefully create and ask proper questions when communicating with my clients and then listen to what they really needed and wanted from me and my company. A salesperson could have the best price on the best quality product in the marketplace. But itís only the best if they can find the right clients who need their product and are capable and willing to purchase it. You discover this only by being a good listener. If I had to guess, I would say that at least 50% of the sales presentations made each day, are made to suspect clients who have no need for the product and would never purchase it. That a lot of wasted time and energy expended daily, that could be avoided by asking proper questions and listening intently.

By listening to what others are saying, you can learn a great deal about that individualís needs and wants and be better prepared to provide solutions for them. This does not only apply to sales. It applies to every relationship we encounter during every day of our lives. Listening is one of the most important skills you can learn, to enrich as well as nurture any type of relationship.

One of the most critical parts to becoming a better listener is to let the other person finish speaking before you weigh in with a response. Listening intently and allowing the other person the courtesy to clearly state what is on their mind will help you to understand the whole conversation better. Too often, individuals have a tendency to interrupt one another, after their first sentence is completed. If you gave the person you are speaking with the time to fully explain themselves, there would be much less of a chance of misinterpreting what they are saying. Just think about all the frustrations and hard feelings that could be avoided, if you allowed someone the courtesy of explaining their thoughts in detail. And you really understood what was on their minds.

Another critical part of the listening process is to avoid beginning a conversation with a predetermined agenda of how the conversation will evolve and eventually end. Have an open mind when you converse with someone and donít attempt to be a mind reader, assuming that the person you are speaking with ďmust actĒ in a specific fashion. If you already believe you know the outcome from a conversation, you tend to turn a deaf ear to that person and wonít hear a word they are saying. To absorb what someone is saying, you need to look them in the eyes and concentrate on every word. You canít have your mind wandering off in space. You must focus on each sentence and absorb the total content of their thoughts before responding.

Life would be so much more pleasant and satisfying, if we really listened to what others were saying before we responded. By doing so, you are illustrating that you really care about their thoughts and ideas, whether you agreed with them or not. Youíll strengthen your relationships with others and each of you will respect each other much more.

Itís seems common to listen more intently to people you first meet, who may have some influence in your future success. If one is trying to make a good first impression on a new employer or employee, they may listen intently to them. On the other hand, itís common to take for granted, those we know for longer periods. Like a husband or wife youíve live with for many years; or perhaps children or parents living in your home. Instead of having these loved ones explain their positions on certain issues or decisions, the deaf ear gets turned to them when they speak. This can become habit forming and lead to non-communication or an end to the relationship altogether.

So the question for this weekís lesson is ďARE YOU REALLY LISTENINGĒ to whatís important to those you verbally communicate with? Itís a very important question to ponder, because some slight adjustments in your listening habits can contribute enormously to the success of your relationships. Starting today, become more interested in the needs of others and let them finish explaining themselves before you begin speaking. You will learn a lot about others and help to nurture more meaningful relationships that can last a lifetime.

Listen to this Article on Podcast.......

Email a friend......E-Mail This Article To A Friend Printer Friendly Version......Print This Article
Copyright ©2015 eHappyLife, LLC - All Rights Reserved
Articles may not be published without the consent of the Author

Learning Life's Lessons Master Archives
The Real Deal Relationships | Parents Should Be Special | Children Learn By Example
Make Time For Your Kids | Don't Wait To Share | Peers and Friends Come and Go
What Can Teams Teach Us? | Who's Telling The Truth?
Should You Fight To Be Right? | Exceeding Job Expectations
Relationships with Stats and Numbers | Using Personal Computers
The Road To Improvement | Doing The Do-able | Moving The Move-able
Doing What You Say | The Greatest Generation | You Can Count On Me
Take More Pride In 2005 | Financial Independence Anyone? | I Just Didnít Have Time!
Avoid Assuming Anything! | Never Take Anything For Granted!
The Power Of Fan Loyalty! | Dangers of Resisting Change! | Life's Peaks And Valleys
The Process Of Reinvention | Wisdom | Intuition and Instincts | A Little Bit At A Time
Why Speed Counts | The 80-20 Principle | Showing Your Appreciation
Think, Focus, And Finish | Learning From Others | The True Value Of Time
A Mother's Day Tribute | Writing Helps To Learn And Share | Are You Really Listening?
Memorial Day Tribute | Changing Is Difficult | Bubbles, Balance & Boredom!
A Perspective On Fatherhood | Why Courtesy Counts? | 1776 And Independence Day
Tools In The Right Hands | Boomers And Retirement | Playing The Games Of Life
How Tech Savvy Are You? | Rhythm And Momentum | Consistency Counts!
The Power Of Saying THANK YOU! | Fix Small Problems Quickly!
A Tribute To Labor Day | Scarcity And Value | College Footbal Lessons
The Most Important Clients | Develop A Solutions Mindset
Lifelong Learning Is Essential | A Game Of Mistakes | Respecting Rules And Laws
The Concept Of Systems | Strive To Make Others Happy | Hire Slow, And Fire Fast
A Lesson About Loyalty | Following-Up Reaps Rewards | Worry Less And Enjoy More
Live Today And Plan For Tomorrow | Something For Nothing review
Some Opinions On Advice | Resolutions Of Health & Peace
Where Dishonesty Can Lead Us | Living Each Day With Purpose | The Work Ethic
Avoiding Misinterpretations | Super Bowl And Our Culture
Start a Lifetime Word Course | Silence Is Golden Rules | A Perspective On Timelines
Invest In What You Know | Setting Priorities Is A Skill | The Power Of Prevention
Finding Relevance When You Retire | Benefit From Daylight Savings
Strive For What You Become | Choosing Price Or Quality | Understanding Your Inflation
Pursuing A Brighter Future | Creating Value And Wealth | The Ultimate Professional
Always Do Your Best | Choose Your Friends Wisely | Thoughts For The Class Of 2006
The Long Road To Showtime | In Memory Of James Rossini
Benefits Of Being A Contrarian | Innovate And Specialize Now!
Invest Your Energy Wisely! | A Hundred Weeks & Counting!
Developing A Sense Of Urgency | Does Fidelity Really Matter?
Does Brand Loyalty Still Matter? | A Perspective On Free Time
The Reality Of Competition | Why The Best Seek Education
Spend And Borrow Money Wisely | Want Your Clients To Love You?
Brainstorming Really Works | Losing Your Best Furry Friend
Be A Student Of Your Body | Drive Safe To Stay Alive | The Relevance Of Polls
The Power Of Paying Promtly | Learning Quickly From Mentors
Singing Happy Birthday Is Powerful | Always Respect Your Competitors
Gambling Is A Bad Bet | Develop An Investment Mindset
Till Respect Do Us Part | Navigating Through Holiday Shopping
Always Field Your Best Team | The Language Of Love
Forget The Ugly Past And Move On | You Are What You Think
The Internet Has Changed Our Lives | Dot The i's And Cross The t's
Service Is Not A Favor | Success + Overwhelm Equals Complacency
Why Real Deal Relationships Expire | The Ugly Costs of Misunderstandings
Taking Giant Steps And Leaps Of Faith | Searching For A Happy Life
Why Can't The Honeymoon Last? | Creating More Serenity Now
Who's Responsible For Irresponsibility? | How To Destroy Team Morale
The Gifts My Parents Gave Me | Turning Dreams And Visions Into Reality
Keep Clean, Organized Surroundings | Return Communications Like A Pro
Start Saving As Early As Possible | In Memory Of Rose Rossini
Bouncing Back From Adversity | The Early Bird Catches The Worm
Howís Your Name Brand Doing? | My One And Only Lesson On Politics
Itís Fatherís Day Once Again | A Trifecta Of Benefits
Mirrors Can Bring Pain Or Pleasure | Gadgets To Improve Your Attitude
Selling Your Conscience For A Buck | Dealing With Daily Obstacles
What Really Matters In Your Life? | What Really Matters In Your Life?
A Perfect Financial Storm Coming? | Avoid Distraction Overload
Turning Passion Into Profit | Disruptive Change Will Rule The Future
Buy Tools Before You Need Them | Pessimism Or Optimism? Your Choice!
Avoid Playing The Blame Game | The Development Of Instincts
Keep It Simple, Efficient & Consistent | Understanding The Workaholic Syndrome
Relationships Are What We Live For | We May Need A Push To Get Started
The Power Of A Positive Attitude | The Emotion Of Disgust
For Boomers And Caring Citizens | The Importance Of Focusing
Always Keep Your Promises | The Power Of Energy
The Power Of Persistence | Remove The Shackles Of Indifference
Become The CEO Of Your Life | A Thirst For Knowledge in 2008
Enjoy Being More Decisive | What Happened To Accountability?
Make Health A Top Priority In 2008 | Less Talk, More Action!
Understanding Team Dynamics | Excuses Benefit No One
Life Is A Balancing Act | Is Happiness Eluding You?
How Do You Define Success? | Time Is Money
The Necessity Of Flexibility | We Are All Salespeople
Being Accountable To Yourself | Dealing With Disappointment
Why Excess Adjusts The Marketplace | Recognizing Value And Importance
Donít Let Worry Drain Your Energy | That's Life!
Build Self Esteem Every Day | Avoid The School Of Hard Knocks
Praise More And Criticize Less | How To Increase Your Business Value
Why You Should Serve Customers Better | Don't Let Small Doubts Stop You!
Numbers, Stats And Market Forces | Always Strive For Excellence
Discipline Is Necessary For Progress | Why Service Can Really Stink
Reduce The Friction In Your Business | Avoid Being Indecisive
Everything You Do In Life Counts! | Time Is Our Most Precious Asset
High Energy Leadership | Anticipating And Preparing For Change
You Are Responsible For Your Choices | Resolve Means "I WILL"
Leading And Learning Communication Skills | Be A Member Of The 5% Club
Leading With An Unshakable Character | Defining Wealth And Value
Who Can You Really Trust? | The Rewards Of Growth
A Two Step Cure For Procrastination | Desire Is A Powerful Emotion
What Makes Customers Buy? | You Must Provide Value To Compete
Honest Self Appraisal | The Fear Of Failure | Take A Deep Breath
Are You A Master Or Victim Of Change? | Act Like A Fiduciary To Restore Trust
Which Will It Be: Inflation Or Deflation? | The Right Selling Price
Why People Don't Set Goals | Take Control Of Your Time
How To Invest Better Using Google

To view Polls by Questions Click Here

To view Polls by Topic Click Here

To view Personal Articles Index Click Here

After 15 years in existance, is about to receive a major UPGRADE for Computers, Tablets and Mobile Devices
Today's Featured Lesson is: The Power Of Saying THANK YOU!
232 Lessons Presented
Click below to listen to Wisdom

Build Your Vocabulary
Download our FREE iPhone & Android APP Now!